June 10th.
Nothing happened on June 10th.
It was supposed to be my due date, with my first pregnancy. But by the time we reached June, our daughter was long gone, we were deep in the heart of our grief, of our missing her.
I miss her still. My heart aches that she is not here.
As I get further along in this pregnancy - 16 weeks now - I feel further from her.
Maybe that's normal. Maybe it's just my heart trying to protect itself, to desperately try to keep myself together so I don't completely fall apart. I don't know.
I just know that I'm sad.
And I miss her. Oh, how I miss her.
Many hugs to you.
Posted by: torthuil | June 10, 2014 at 06:25 PM
Or maybe it's just time, that takes us farther away every day.
Posted by: allmyprettyones | June 10, 2014 at 06:53 PM
16 weeks. Oh, how I want to hear in 22 weeks or so that this boy has come screaming into this world. I'm sorry you're feeling so far away from your sweet girl - I do think that there is an enormous amount of self-preservation involved in a pregnancy after stillbirth. Without distancing ourselves a little bit, I think we'd just crash all at once right over that edge into total craziness, instead of teetering along it, wobbling back and forth.
Posted by: March is for daffodils | June 11, 2014 at 09:33 PM
Hugs.
Posted by: conceptionallychallenged | June 13, 2014 at 12:35 AM